Guidelines for Marriage by a Redeemer Pastor
Guidelines for Marriage by a Redeemer Pastor
Congratulations on this exciting time of preparation for your upcoming wedding ceremony and marriage! If you wish to have a Redeemer pastor officiate your wedding, please review the guidelines below and complete and submit the pre-marriage questionnaire to the appropriate congregational email address included below as soon as possible. Please note that considering the size of our church and the total number of pastors on staff, the pastor you request may already be at capacity and unable to officiate your wedding. This is why we advise contacting pastors as soon as possible.
Guidelines to help you plan for a wedding with a Redeemer pastor:
- Complete the pre-marriage questionnaire: Please fill out the form here.
- Review of your questionnaire: A Redeemer pastor will receive your completed questionnairre for review and we will contact you with any questions and next steps. Before a pastor can confirm that he can perform the wedding he may request an initial meeting with the couple. In this session, you can expect the pastor to ask you about information supplied in your questionnaire including:
Your Christian faith: When did you become a Christian? What does it mean to be a Christian? What is the place that Christian faith has in your life? Are you both actively involved as members in a local church?
The nature of your relationship: What is the history of your relationship? How do your friends and family feel about it? What do you perceive to be the greatest strengths and weaknesses of the relationship? Are you living together? Have you maintained sexual purity? Have there been relationships in the past that are unreconciled (i.e. if you’ve been married before)?
- Preparation with a Redeemer pastor: Once a Redeemer pastor has been confirmed to preside over your wedding, you should coordinate schedules as early as possible to ensure that he is available for your wedding date and to allow adequate time to complete the premarital seminar and premarital counseling process, allowing no less than six months between the time of the initial contact at the actual wedding.
- Premarital seminar: The couple must attend the Redeemer premarital seminar, “Preparing for Marriage.” The seminar is a six-hour course that discusses the meaning and purpose of marriage, the qualities necessary to have a healthy marriage, the true nature of love and how to effectively express it, communication and conflict resolution, role relationships and sexuality in marriage. It involves lectures and one-on-one interactions.
- Premarital counseling: Depending on the couple’s background and level of readiness, a pastor will provide three-to-six counseling sessions with the couple to supplement the seminar. Some pastors employ diagnostic tools or surveys to supplement their counseling, which may entail additional cost.
- Wedding venues: Redeemer's W83 Ministry Center is available for individual contract rental of space for events such as rehearsal dinners and weddings. Please contact [email protected] to inquire about availability and rental information.
Weddings at W83
If you are getting married in another church, be mindful that certain churches have restrictions concerning officiating pastors so make sure to verify their policies.
- Wedding licenses: Redeemer pastors are not responsible for the processing of wedding licenses. You are responsible for ensuring the proper processing of necessary wedding documents.
- Out-of-town weddings: Some pastors will perform out-of-town ceremonies and others will not. You must contact the pastor to see if he is available for such a wedding. Whether the ceremony is in town or not, you should plan to pay for any necessary travel expenses and accommodations, and provide clear directions and the precise address to the wedding facility. (Please understand that an out-of-town wedding is a significant commitment on the part of the pastor!)
- Honorarium: The suggested honorarium for the pastor performing your ceremony is $500-$1,000, depending on the number of counseling sessions that he provides. This is paid directly to the pastor. If additional counseling is required, the pastor may suggest additional sessions or refer you to the Redeemer Counseling Center. If there is a financial hardship involved in the cost of these sessions, please discuss this with your pastor.
- Wedding rehearsal and reception: The pastor will generally conduct the wedding rehearsal at the agreed upon rehearsal time. Regretfully, pastors are not always available to attend rehearsal dinners and receptions. It is our sincere hope that such inability is not taken as an offense.
- The wedding: Usually a meeting will be required to discuss the actual details of the wedding service. On the day of the wedding, plan to have the entire wedding party at the church at least one hour before the ceremony. IF you wish to have live photography or have your wedding filmed, please discuss appropriate parameters with the pastor before the wedding day. Thank you for the opportunity to serve you on this special occasion!
Redeemer Wedding Officiants: The following is a list of Redeemer pastors who may be available to officiate weddings and provide premarital counseling, along with the congregational email address where you can inquire about their availability:
|Rev. David Bisgrove||[email protected]|
|Rev. Charles Chung||[email protected]|
|Rev. Andrew Field||[email protected]|
|Rev. Joel Kady||[email protected]|
|Rev. Michael Keller||[email protected]|
|Rev. David Lee||[email protected]|
|Rev. Hector Sanchez||[email protected]|
|Rev. Jeff White||[email protected]|
|Rev. Bruce O'Neil||[email protected]|
Each person should fill out the following questionnaire separately. When both of you have submitted the completed form your information will be forwarded to the pastor you have requested to officiate your wedding. This information must be submitted prior to your first meeting with him.